Are you waiting until you know everything in order to feel confident? I used to believe I had to be the expert to justify being confident.
Chasing confidence became extremely exhausting. I waited and waited. I could predict the times I would lack confidence and dread those situations - wishing them away and hiding in a corner.
I was waiting for something external to validate me as ‘confident’. But it didn’t come. Even when I had the answers and achieved success, I still didn’t feel the confidence I had expected.
Needing to be the expert became intertwined with confidence. 'When I know everything, then I will be confident.'
But other narratives started to challenge this belief….
I noticed other people didn’t know everything and yet still seemed to be confident. So that baffled me. I witnessed confident-looking people ask for clarification on something or openly admit ‘I don’t know’. I saw how even when people looked confident they would confess that they were nervous.
Confidence will not be found from an external source. It will come from within.
When you realise you don’t have to have all the answers, you don’t need to be the expert at everything, you are allowed to say ‘I don’t know’, and can STILL be confident, you stop looking for that external ‘fix’ and realise the power is within you.
Gemma Brown is an associate certified coach with the International Coach Federation, working with people to navigate successfully through transitions - be it career, relationships or life in general. Her belief is that when we confidently bring our whole selves to all areas of life, anything is possible. Transitions exist in both our personal and business life, and so often, the two fiercely overlap. Coaching with Gemma focuses on you as a whole, enabling you to identify your strengths, build confidence and to live a life with increased purpose and direction. Gemma is based in Cambridgeshire and carries out face to face coaching in the area as well as 1-2-1 coaching via Skype and Zoom. For more about Gemma, visit her 'About' page or contact her directly.
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